Saturday, August 22, 2009

~言情小说~

事情的发生:Physics Lab 里,我们一群人正在兴高采烈的讨论关于言情小说。因为很碰巧的,竟发现有共同的兴趣。这时,班上的某位友人,(因为某些特殊关系,我被威胁不可揭发这人的身份,所以。。。)短称为X小姐,很三八的插入话题,并宣布了自己从没读过言情小说的事实。由于凯薇有带着一本,所以我们便建议她拿去读。

虽然挣扎了一下,但是X最终还是抵挡不了好奇心而借回去了。

结果第二天,她早上到学校便兴高采烈的告诉我她读完了,而且还很自豪似的。

之后,不知是太过无聊还是按捺不住了,她写了篇读后感给我:


读后感:

读过李雪瑜小姐强力推荐的《撒金败家女》(黑田著),我个人有些意见及想法。《撒金败家女》脱不开典型的色情言情小说故事路线。此类书籍一向爱以超级大富豪之子女或一夜间暴发的男女为主角,制造出一种“只有钱才能让感情升华”的假象。主角皆有俗称“杀死人不偿命”的样貌及身材,把人世间的爱鼓吹至天上有地下无的情景。书中主角也毫无避免的,是富豪;也毫无避免的,在第一次邂逅对彼此留下“深刻的印象和色相”,并对彼此产生“性趣”,乃俗书中的俗书。书中女主角虽贵为“美女”,却是“处子之身”,而且“第一次的男人”往往是“鲁莽、粗暴的男人”,并且事后一定后悔自己当初没有“怜香惜玉”。故事比童话故事更为美满。唯此书中的“巫婆”是女主角的小妈。书中也过动夸大男女私处。私处,便是私处。奈何作者用“神秘的花园”及“男性的骄傲”来美化“杂草堆”和“小弟”,把男女之事(运动)美化为“享受”。并把男主角的挑逗本事用女方的“欲仙欲死”来证明。尽管医学报告证实了超过一半的人不满意自己的性生活,然此书依然给了未成年少男女假希望。少男以为可以征服所有人,少女则以为可以收买人,乃此书之大错!

总结来说,此书带给本人的冲击力很大。我的眼睛受到了刺激。奉劝各位“三思而后读”。我发誓,再也不敢看了。

既然这为小姐那么爱写,我也好心点的给些评论好了。


评论:

这为同学,很明显的,你不是害羞过度,便是心虚了。虽然我猜是后者。以你死命的批评所有关系到“色”字眼的细节,我认为你也太明显的想掩饰自己得罪恶感。说吧,八成是看得流口水了,事后才后悔起来,恼羞成怒,才骂得如此吧!而且,这为同学,我难免发现到你只注意到书中“色”的部分。这可是十分要不得的!毕竟,男女之间的*ahem*运动,只不过是爱情上的点缀罢了。你为何没多注意主角之间的互动,感情的发展,及人格思想上的改变呢?唉!真是个要不得的丫头,还停留在小时候只对“性”“样貌”感到有兴趣而完全忽略了其他的地步吗?而且,我觉得你可真是个太过跟随感情的家伙。这不是你的“第一次”么?怎么能如此肯定的把所有言情小说都拿这本为模范呢?让我告诉你吧,言情小说可是层出不穷的,每一本都有不同的构思,故事及人物。但愿你不要这么爽快的做结论。实在的,怎么这么孩子气,难道你平常看人一眼,不爽的话,便直接把他视为敌人吗?我但愿不是。此外,我认为你对自己及对异性的想法也未免太过极端了吧!而且你对“爱”这事也显得毫无经验及信心可言。为何你就如此否定男女之间的互动呢?而且,把自己的下面称为“杂草堆”也未免太失礼了!难道对自己的身体感到没信心?男生知道你对他们下体的想法有极大可能会气得不顾一切证明给你看男人的“长度”可不是可以拿来和“小”相提并论的!所以,对自己的性别及异性尊重点吧!还有一点,说穿了,“做”这种事从以前到现在还实行着,一定是因为“爽”吧!不然来干什呀?不过,值得夸奖的,你文笔不错,而且我觉得你的脑袋真好,还蛮善于记这一类的“科学证明”。这点可喜可贺,证明了你拥有很好的记忆力,而且,也证明了你的潜意识是对“这种事”还颇感兴趣的!

所以,就以各种理由而言,我觉得你并不是“眼睛”而是其它部位受刺激吧?

最后,想奉劝你扩大自己的思考,诚实的接收自己心里想要看的,读的,写的,感受的。这么一来,我觉得你会发现自己更有女人味点!做人别这么固执了~《学海》不也教各位不要按捺自己么?

所以,承认吧,你是还想再读的吧~!>_<

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

What The *BEEP* !!!!

Read this line:

"Therefore, Locus P is also a circle."

Because of these mere short 7 words, we had to copy the answer to a 2007 Maths T1 past year question for A HUNDRED TIMES!!

Yup, your eyes haven't gone bad, and I didn't type wrong: 100 *FREAKING* Times!!

And before you say it, no, the answer isn't even remotely near the word 'SHORT'. In fact, it was LONG, have LOTS of steps and X+Y's.

And the icing on the cake (or should i just say SALT ON THE WOUND), is that we have to pass up this remarkable piece of so-called CORRECTION within the last period of school.

And oh, did our Ms. Lee say it with such flair and attitude. "100 times. I don't care, you have to pass up by TODAY!"

And I was like "What the--(Insert your own choice of rude words)!!"

And thus, today, the whole Physics class could be seen quiet and orderly for a change, with our heads down and our pen moving and the paper and small mumblings it could almost be interpreted by any passer-by that we have turned over a new leaf and were studying.

OH, how wrong were they.

TRUTH:
We are FEVERISHLY copying one time after another of the SAME freaking sentences just trying to make it to 100 times. And the mumbling? That was just cursing language reserved for adults ears.

I swear. By the time I reached over 20, my body was on autopilot and my brain wasn't working at all. Except when I am thinking out NEW and INVENTIVE ways to CURSE a certain 'vege-kuih'.

And I don't even want to go on to the unreal transformation of my handwriting...From readable-->SHIT.

And the only things that disturbed the image of us as 'HARDWORKING STUDENTS' are the constant outbursts and display of insanity.

Such as: "Aargh!!! My hand is freaking getting NUMB!!"

"SHIT! So long only number 20 only!!!"

"MOTHERF***KER!!! I hope someone goes SC**W 'vegekuih'!!"

And so on...

Haiz.

Really, I swear, because of her, my choice and knowledge of curses and swears have definitely been upgraded to a whole new level...

Even now, when I am typing this, my right hand is sore and ACHING!

DAMN. Like what Miao said: MEME KISIAO!!!!

FUCK! If I don't get A in T1 I am really going to MURDER 'Vege-Kuih'!

Another unfortunate thing=Ah Sir just had to come and check on the cleanliness of the windows on such an inopportune time. Really, he should receive an award at the "Worst Timing Awards" ceremony.

And of course, the windows weren't clean and me, as penyelaras, was called out. He then proceeded to wipe the dirt off the windows and insist to HIGH FIVE with me...Making my ACHING and SORE hand DIRTY and BLACK....Haiz haiz. So much for bad luck eh?

Good thing he didn't mengamuk...And I am going to make sure all the windows clean tomorrow~

Again: SODDING T1!! TOTALLY INSANE! MEME KARUT dan BENGONG!

Forgive the language, it's the most truthful way of expressing this F***ING situation.

Till next time.

FROM: An experiencing mental and physical TRAUMA Physics Student.


Wednesday, June 3, 2009

ClaSS idiOtiC acT--3-~

上个星期,我看到奕文在鬼鬼祟祟地写东西,不问还好,一问才知道她在写情信给芊芊,本班的副班长。结果,我们开始比赛起来,看谁能写封比较好的信。。。

以下是奕文语气有点变态的情信:

致超级亲爱的芊芊:

这是我用手连着心,一起写的情信。不准笑!!!我是真心的,希望你能笑纳。
你的心是世界上最神妙的东西。无论我如何接近它,它总是狠心地把我拒于门外。我用尽锁匙,它的锁却打不开。我到底该怎么办呢?
你的样貌也是其中一个世界七大奇观之一。它总是深深烙印在我脑海,久久挥散不去。
WMB3125,我不能忘却它,即使它一次一次抢了我的停车位,我却恨不了它。请你告诉我,我是不是有病了?为什么一切和你有关的东西。我都一一记在心里呢?
我和你,人海里。竞相遇,不就是一种难得的缘分吗?就让这个缘分更上一层楼,请你接受我吧!!!

最爱你的奕文上


是不是很变态呢??!!

好吧,来看看我甜蜜的情信

亲爱的芊芊:

原本,我并没有打算将我这分心意传达给你。不过,当我获知奕文打算写情信给你时,我的心中强烈的告诉我一定要阻止你被她的情信给打动!!因为,她根本配不起你!
你的美貌,你的智慧,你的优雅,你的善良,你的一切的一切,无论里外,都是那么的美丽动人!这令我不禁对你动心!
我了解如果你不回应我的心意,但我只是想让你知道我的心意而已,让你知道,还有一个我在默默地喜欢着你。让你知道,你除了奕文,还有我这个超级不错的选择!!
所以,再一次的,我喜欢你!
真的很喜欢,所以我不忍心看着你被奕文欺骗!芊芊,把她拒绝,好好考虑我吧!

爱你的瑜。

看~!是不是好很多呢??>_<

此外,奕文还写了一首诗:

你是我的太阳 (你嫌芊芊很圆么?!)
照亮我的生命 (你有生命可以照亮meh?!)
你是我的月亮 (芊芊的脸是滑的!!)
引导我走过夜晚 (傻婆!你当芊芊是幽魂?!)
你是我的星星 (这样多星星,哪个啊?!)
替我点缀沉闷的夜空 (原来你闷才找芊芊。。。)
你是我的流星 (流星是步入灭亡的。。。)
给我无限意外的惊喜
你还真有如流星般短暂的爱。。。)
你是我的水 (你才该心如止水!!〕
滋润我的生命 (水进入沙漠般的生命也会干枯。。。)
没有你, (你根本就无法拥有她!)
我也不想活了, (去死吧!!〕
为了我的生命, (不屑!!)
请你接受我吧!! (哇~!!永远都不可能!!)

青色--> 奕文
粉红色-->

结果,芊芊看了,点点头说:“嗯,很不错!!”

不过,我敢肯定,她在看奕文的信时,眼神透露了恐慌。。。

>_<


Friday, May 29, 2009

Form 6 MOTIVATION CAMP~

I went for my Form 6 Motivation Camp some time ago. It was a three day, two night stay inTok Bali at a resort named as 'Sweet Beach Resort'...And so, after gathering in the school during the morning, we started our journey via bus at ten something in the morning.

First Day:
Our teacher had only told us in the morning that we would be sleeping in fours in rooms instead of in dorms. This means that we have our own bathroom. This was a great relieve as the bathroom of the dorms are located outside and it is 'ala-Western' which means NO DOORS. We girls had been worrying about how to take a nice bath with a sarung so its good that we don't need to worry about it.

On the bus, we sang and 'ki-siao-ed' with one another~After the tedious process of checking in and receiving keys, we immediately went to our room to seek refuge from the scorching sun. And after changing and washing up, we went for our motivation slot. My brother came with his friend who is our motivator and I got news that my cat Snowy had given birth to FIVE kittens~!!

Then there was the Maths T2 slot. Jia Wei's dad was the penceramah. It was ok, and I think the notes he gave are quite detailed and useful~

Maths T1 was by our own Ms. Lee CK. She really proved herself as a First Class Honours. There were two slots. The first for teaching methods and the second for exercises. The first was very lovely, but the second was just pure hell as she reversed back into the Ms. Lee in class and asked us to do a LOT of exercises in a very limited time..But I gained a lot of info though...

Nothing much could be said today. Except that the room opposite mine where Wei Fong, Keh Jun, Caryn and Xiao Shuang were supposed to sleep at had a LOT of cockroaches. Therefore, Caryn and Xiao Shuang tumpang at our room while the other two went to bunk with Art Class students.

Second Day:
Almost cannot wake up...The first event was PA quiz. And last night our group had studied until quite late. The quiz was a very very fun and nice event to do. After five rounds, we won!! It was a minor difference between us and the Art class, but nevertheless, WE WON!! It was a happy thing for all of us.

The PA ceramah afterwards was by our own PK HEM. Unfortunately, by some unknown reason, my spectacles was broken. Therefore, even though I was siting in the first row I had difficulty reading the things he wrote on the white board. Vaguely, I wondered how I was going to survive the next two ceramahs...

Next, PHYSICS. This was supposed to be THE MOST IMPORTANT ceramah for us Form 6 science students who are taking Physics. My hopes of hearing a good ceramah dimmed when I saw the penceramah. And when she started, doubts begin to form in my mind. Mr. Lim came in then, our beloved Physics teacher in school, and sat one side to listen too. And then...the penceramah, a 'she', said: "Ahh...Apa formula too lagi...?"

That's it. All my hopes of getting something good was SQUASHED the moment she said that. And when Mr. Lim had stood up to help her, remind her of the formulas, write it out for her, I felt DESPAIR...My heart dropped as far as my mouth dropped.

What the--?! Was she really a marker??!! And she can't even remember the basic formulas like v=u + at and said it as S=u + at....HAIZ...She asked us to do past year questions but can't even expplain or tell us formulas but ask us copy the typed out answers displayed on the screen. And there were NUMEROUS times that she required Mr. Lim's help.

It was the most torturing slot for me...I could only hope that time could go faster. Even now that I am recalling and writing this that I feel so angry and despair that words couldn't bring justice to how shocked and tortured I was during the slot. And I think all of us felt the same too. After that I swore to myself and Mr. Lim that I will always pay attention to him in class.

But still, I got myself to listen attentively through the whole slot. I could tell that she really was trying to give us a good ceramah, but all I wanted to tell her is: "Hon, you don't have the chops or skills for it." Nevertheless, I applaud her on her courage and determination to give us ceramah.

I think the thing that all of us gained from it was that we will definitely pay attention to Mr. Lim in class now. We really realize how good and important our beloved teacher is. >_< _="">

Friday, May 22, 2009

I am INNOCENT!!

Just finish reading Miao's blog. And my mind has only one thought: What the--?!

She claims that she is so 'pure and innocent' and it is actually me, juntat and zhenjee who polluted her. She then proceeded to make a poll with me. zhenjee. juntat and herself as the choices with the question: WHO POLLUTED ME?

And of course, the choice 'HERSELF' currently has the highest vote.

As if this doesn't prove my innocence, let me highlight a few examples for you.

Example 1: I am a good and nice and INNOCENT girl who has suspended the use of such vulgar adjectives such as CB, CBB and so on but ever since entering Form 6 and sitting beside the so-called innocent and pure MIAO, my verbal capacity has increased rapidly. They say that if nearer to the ink one will get blacker. So it proves that I am the nearest to Ms. Heng, so I am polluted most by her.

Example 2: She is the one who always created weird and QIAO statements using her YELLOW brain in class. Grab ANY person from our class and they will tell you its Miao who is the ultimate GURU of QIAONESS in our class...=_="

Example 3: The whole of our class (excluding a few boys) are originally all so cute, pure and innocent. Then Ah Miao had to come along and pollute us all. Now you could always listen to Qian Qian or Pei Chin saying things which have HIDDEN MEANING. And all of us always come together and mourn for our lost INNOCENCE.

Example 4: She who denies most but does most and blames most is surely guilty. Needless to say, Miao always deny herself being the one who pollutes all of us. Then blames it on innocent victims like me and juntat and zhenjee, and then proceeds to pull or hug someone and say QIAO things.

So all in all, I can pretty much say this: I AM POLLUTED BY MIAO!

So how can I pollute her nih?

As a conclusion, she polluted herself. So please do me and juntat and zhenjee JUSTICE by going over to her blog: Horny Crabby at http://crabby220.blogspot.com and vote 'HERSELF' as the answer.

Your vote may just clear all of our innocent names. So please, VOTE!

On another note; Due to being over polluted, Miao had decided to go on a campaign titled: No Vulgarities!! But it seems that she can't control herself at all and keep blurting out 'kata-kata kesat'.

P.S: Miao~Don't angry nah~Like you said, it's all for fun~(And truth!!) Besides, consider this PAYBACK for you SUMO-ING me at the girls toilet!!

A/N: I have never used that much capital letters...Ever. But this post requires it...There are SOOO many things to EMPHASIZE on~>_<


Saturday, May 16, 2009

...A 'SweaTDroP' EvenT....

I came back from the Form 6 Motivation Camp yesterday. I am going to write about it...But since its already night and there is too many things that I want to write on it, I decided to leave it until tomorrow to write about it.

Today, I went to the library after my Maths tuition. I tumpang-ed MeiJiun's car since my car got a bit ngetok dy. Anyway, at first there were only me, meijiun, xinfang, songsee, jiahui, shunyuh and kahkheng...We studied until five where Jiun and ah fong went for their PA tuition. Left me and Kah Kheng since Song See and Jia Hui short-plug go play basketball during the scorching 4 sth.

Afterwards, Desmond came and the five of us, me, Kah Kheng, Song See, Jia Hui and Des started talking. And JiaHui suddenly remembered that he wanted to claim money from the other 3 boys. It seems that a bunch of them had decided to share together to buy a bunch of food for the camp.

Des suddenly exclaimed:
Ma1 de4!!!!Why must I pay so much de?!
Hui: What?!
CB you! It really that much mar!
Des:
TIU you!! I only eat like a few crappy bread, biscuits and maggi cup only!
Hui:
F***! Then who eat?! CB eh!
Des: What the?! Its Ah Tiu who eat lor!
Hui:
CB him! He eat sipe much lor!

And the quarrel proceeded. Admist calls and uses of
CB, F***, TIU you! and other vulgarities, the conversation itself is SOOO funny that me and Kah Kheng were laughing like mad.

And I can say for sure that for every sentence that Jia Hui says, there is an average one CB in it~>_<>

But one thing I learnt about guys: They can quarrel about money but it is highly unlikely that it will harm their friendship. Usually I don't really like to share about uncertain things like food, expenses and such because in the end some may feel that others eat more and feel too unfair and such. And counting until the very last penny and arguing about money may harm relationships too. But I figure the way with guys are different. Hell, they could be shouting CB, CBB, LJ and arguing with each other about the amount of money each should pay but it won't harm their feelings in the slightest. It's kind of sweet actually~>_<

But still...I did learn a lot of
INTERESTING ways to use vulgaritites from today's event...And it was the best laugh that I had for sometime~

Friday, May 1, 2009

IdiOtiC cLaSS....AcT 2


Okay...So my class got crazy again. After the last post where I mentioned about the illness where each of us SUPPOSEDLY have, we did another whole class thing.

It started with us switching to the Physics Lab for a day as our class was prepared for our oncoming MUET test. And my class monitor, Mr. Lee KS, began to go beserk again. He started his marvelous plan of drawing out every single person in my class...

And this is the end product which he produced after much pondering(yeah right...) and utilizing his fine talent in art(ugh...) :



Trust me...Everyone looks a LOT nicer than this pic...Maybe with the exception of Keng Sheng though~*EVIL LAUGH*

Update on current life: It sucks. My results are like crap. Pending for Physics results. Expected to known next Sunday...Wish me luck~!!

P.S: If you want to see the picture clearer just click on it~!! >_<